Can't the AI Just Do That?

Meet the Strunks! (Hey! Hey!) Meet the Strunks! (Hey! Hey!)
"So what do you do?" "I write." (Can't the AI just do that?)

Thursday, five o'clock, Theo's on the porch
Store-bought pie, and a smile that's a little forced
He wipes both hands on his jeans before he knocks
Nobody saw it but me. I take his hand. The door unlocks

(Meet the Strunks!)
Dad's got a chatbot and it says he's right (He's right!)
Mom made the pie from an app last night (Three cups of salt!)
Uncle Rick's bot is up four hundred percent (On paper!)
Then the whole table turns like a meeting no one sent

"So what do you actually do?" (I write!)
"You write? Can't the AI just do that?"
Pass the stuffing, pass the plate
"Can't the AI just do that?"
Meet the Strunks! (Hey! Hey!) Meet the Strunks! (Hey! Hey!)
Can't the AI, can't the AI just do that?

Dad asks his bot if the turkey's dry. "Statistically, yes"
Rick's bot shorts the gravy. "It was priced in, I guess"
Kayla points her phone at me and asks it, "Is she real?"
It spins and spins and spins. I pass the peas. No big deal
Theo's down to "brand voice," explaining it to a ham
Mom says, "So it's Instagram?" And Theo says, "Yes, ma'am"

(Meet the Strunks!)
Kayla's got a toast and her phone wrote it down (She's thankful!)
Grandma's got no phone, she just looks around (Mm-hm)
Rick says, "Buddy, I could prompt your job by noon" (By noon!)
And the whole table laughs, and Theo laughs too soon

"So what do you actually do?" (I write!)
"Like, Instagram? Can't the AI just do that?"
Pass the gravy, pass the blame
"Can't the AI just do that?"
Meet the Strunks! (Hey! Hey!) Meet the Strunks! (Hey! Hey!)
Can't the AI, can't the AI just do that?

Kayla stands and reads it: "As an AI language model, I am thankful for..."

Grandma taps her glass and looks at Theo: "You. You write things"
One napkin, one pen, thirty seconds flat
The burnt rolls, the salty pie, the arguments, the laughs
He reads it out loud
Grandma sniffs: "Omit needless words." ... "Good boy"
Then Dad puts his phone face down (Face down)

"So what do you actually do?" (He writes!)
He writes! The AI can't do that!
Pass the stuffing, pass the plate
The AI can't do that!
Meet the Strunks! (Hey! Hey!) Meet the Strunks! (Hey! Hey!)
Grandma's card from eighty-seven, back in her hand
I had it in my pocket. Don't ask how
Dad leans in: "So... is she AI?"

"Pass the—"